Answers to Prayers

Answers to Prayers by Kim Kerby Hildebrandt

Many years ago, I was sitting in a Fast and Testimony meeting in which an individual who had severely transgressed, spoke of their repentance. This person had had a feeling of overwhelming love from the Savior---so real in fact, that they felt as if the Savior were really holding and embracing them physically. I was troubled by this. I had never experienced a feeling of such love from my Savior or my Father in Heaven. I began to feel a bit hurt that I had never been dealt with in this manner. I felt a tinge of envy and self-pity. Then I prayed. I asked, (childishly, I admit) "Why have I not had these feelings or experiences?" I prayed to feel the same love, to feel the same affection, and to know as assuredly that I was loved. The answer did not see m to come. I felt no dramatic overtures. I determined that it was most likely due to the fact I just had not paid the price.

So, for almost a year, I increased my prayers, my scripture study and my temple attendance. I would turn off the radio and just use any time I was driving to pray fervently to my Heavenly Father. BUT nothing had happened! I did not have that tangible hug from My Father or the Savior! My time was, granted, very limited as I was the mother of six young children, all under the age of ten, and I was home schooling at this point.

Well, some months later my parents were moving to Montana from Iowa. They were unable to move all of their furniture. So, they asked if I was interested in flying to Iowa in order to drive a U-Haul truck full of furniture back to Ypsilanti Michigan. My husband and I had just moved into our first home, and we did not have much furniture. So, when I was provided an opportunity to go to Iowa alone, I decided that I would use that time to continue, in earnest, my quest for that hug as well as gain the much needed furniture!

I had only been allowed a certain number of miles to go from Iowa to Michigan by the rental truck company. I had forgotten to add the detour to the Chicago Temple into the allotted mileage with the U-Haul! I also had very limited funds for gas, food and none for lodging. Yet, it had been some time since I had been able to attend the temple. I decided that though it would be a leap of faith, I would chance it. I took the detour and headed for the temple. I prayed that the detour to the Chicago Temple would not incur too high a penalty in terms of additional mileage and gas. I also prayed that I might be able to afford the detour physically as well as financially, since it would require that I drive through the night to return the truck on time.

I got to the Temple early in the evening. I entered the Temple and at the entrance to greet me, was a former Bishop and his wife! I had not been in their area for over 6 years! It was such a sweet and comforting reunion! They called me by name, remembered me and hugged me and led me further inside. They asked about my family, was I there alone, had I eaten, did I have a place to stay the night? They seemed to want to meet my every need. They assisted me in obtaining my temple clothing, and in all ways ministered gently and lovingly to me. I was moved to tears! This kindness was very much like them, albeit even more intense. Then, when I told them I had not yet eaten, they insisted upon buying me dinner in the cafeteria, they were just going to dinner themselves they said. I told them I did not need lodging, as I just planned on driving straight through. The rest of the evening, they kept asking me to change my mind and just stay with them overnight! They were so solicitous and kind.

I was blessed to be able to attend two sessions and to spend more time in the Celestial Room than I ever had previously. There, I put forth my long-standing petition. But, still I had not had the experience I had longed for ---- the Savior to hold me in a tangible way. I bade farewell to the Cardon's and they hugged me tight and through my tears, I told them how much I loved them, and how grateful I was to be able to see them again---they were now serving a temple mission! I stopped to get some gas near 11 pm.

Just before starting on the long 8 hour trip home from there, I broke down and began to weep. I cried out in my heart and said, "Heavenly Father, why? What more do I have to do? Of all places, I would have thought I would have had my prayers answered in thy Temple!" And then, a voice in my mind asked this, " What more could I have done for you KIM?" My mind instantly recalled all that the Cardon's had done for me while in the Temple. And, my tears turned to tears of shame. I had had His love manifested in a very real and physical way. Yet, I had overlooked it. I had been looking beyond the mark. I wondered what else my kind and loving Father had done to show His love to me and I had ignored or refused to see it! I had been blessed beyond measure, but had not even accepted that amazing gift for what it was! I reflected back on everything that the Cardons had done and even tried to do for me, most of which I would not accept! I bowed my head in shame and renewed gratitude. I thanked HIM for allowing me to have such a beautiful experience and begged for forgiveness for not seeing it for what it truly was. My prayers had been answered so completely and tenderly!

I learned many valuable lessons that day. 1.) The Lord does care and loves us ALL! One indication of that love is His invitation and admonition to pray!2.) The Lord does meet our needs and cares for us in many different ways. 3.) We can be the means of answering the prayers of others. We can be instruments in the hands of our Heavenly Father. Others can feel His love through our showing love to others.4.) Heavenly Father does answer our Prayers! If we are not humble and receptive, if we do not have the spirit of gratitude, we can overlook the answers and miss the joy and love intended for us.

I returned home safely, early in the morning the next day. We unloaded the truck, and I returned it to the U-haul dealer. I had zero cash left, it took my last penny to fill the tank, but, I had enough. And, just as I pulled into the U-Haul place, the odometer turned to the exact number of miles I had been allowed and I was able to return the truck on time! I owed no additional money! That was a miracle---yet another manifestation of the love and caring of Our Heavenly Father for me.

But the story does not end there. About 4 months later, I was again able to go back to the Chicago Temple. I again, was able to see the Cardons. But, as I ran up to hug and kiss them, it was very clear that they did NOT remember me! It was awkward and a bit embarrassing! I then disclosed my name and how we had known each other years ago. Later, I mentioned this experience to my Mother. She commented, "Oh, that must have hurt your feelings or was at least disappointing, huh? I said, "NO, not at all. You see, to me it is just a further witness that those months earlier, it was my Heavenly Parents answering my prayers and welcoming me home. Now, I know the ministering was not just because I had been remembered by the Cardon's! But, I am so very grateful they were receptive to His promptings and were instrumental in bringing to me such a powerful experience.

I am trying to become more like them, and of course, my Savior, in showing love to my brothers and sisters so they too can feel Heavenly Father's love for them. I testify that what I have related is true. I consider this a sacred experience and cherish its memory. I am inexpressibly grateful to my Heavenly Father for prayer. I have a sure knowledge that He is attentive. He hears and answers prayers. It is precious, sweet and humbling to know that He, our Father, yearns to hear from us---all of us! That knowledge gives self-esteem as nothing else can. It is awe inspiring to know that our Creator, our Eternal Father, the ONE to whom all things are possible, the ONE whose accomplishments are endless and perfect, a Supreme Being---is willing, and even wishes, to commune with me, with each of us!

Now I shall never be granted audience with a King or President of any nation. Nor, of even more value to me, do I ever expect to meet personally and speak heart to heart with our Beloved Prophet. Yet, ONE greater than any man that has ever lived, desires to give me audience, any time, any place and for as long as I wish. That is the awesome nature of prayer. I can communicate openly with Deity, (at Heavenly Father's request!) anytime I choose! That to me, is humbling and sobering. His invitation is to us all! It means we all have great worth.